It wasn't me who said "the facts can all be substantiated". You're not the vicar by any chance? Toby is a good solid vicar's name.
Toby the Vicar (for it is he). "Let us pray."
The congregation kneels.
Toby the Vicar. "Today we pray for the souls of those who are deluded by internet hoaxes. For they should be exalted."
Congregation. "Exalt them, that they may be saved."
Toby the Vicar. "And we ask the Lord to cast into the pit those who make fun of those who are deluded by internet hoaxes. For they are damned to eternal hellfire and pitch."
Congregation. "Into the pit with them, the weevils".
Toby the Vicar. "And we ask you, in the name of our merciful redeemer, to smothered with your Holy cushion those who ask those who are deluded by internet hoaxes to put forward evidence that they have not been deluded in the form of verifiable facts, for facts are the Antichrist, the enemy of God's word."
Congregation. "verily and unto the seventh generation shall they be smothered."
Toby the Vicar. "And all these things we ask in your name, O Lord".
Congregation.Amen. |
